How To Pass Your Driver's Test The First Time

Part I

1. Turn the radio on. When the tester goes
to turn it off slap his/her hand.

2. Rev the car really high, turn to the tester,
and say with an evil look, "Buckle up!"

3. Knock over every cone while doing maneuverability.
In the middle of it, get out and check to see if you
have hit every one.

4. Come dressed in a suit. Before the examiner
gets in the car, ask him/her to put a piece of plastic
wrap down so he doesn't dirty the seat.

5. When the examiner tells you to stop, step on
the gas. Tell him/her that you thought it was the brake.

6. When the examiner tells you to stop, pop the
hood clutch and say, "Oops."

7. Get in the car, look down at the pedals, and say,
"Now which one is the gas again?"

8. After the examiner gets in the car, pop the hood,
and get out and check the oil.

9. Fill your car with beer bottles.

10. The whole time driving, talk about how Aunt
Gertrude smells like mothballs.

11. Tell the registrar that you are taking the remedial

12. In the middle of driving, put your arm around
the examiner.

13. Swear at everybody on the road.

14. When you stop at a light, start revving the
engine while looking back and forth between the
person next to you and the light.

15. Beep your horn at everything.

16. Break off your rear-view mirror and then
ask the examiner to hold it up.